It's hard to think straight

Things aren’t just what they seemed, are they? It seems like I’ve been fooled, and I’m really certain that I am. The thing is, remember those promises I wrote here about what the school had offered? Well, I’m getting none of it. First of all, the fast-track option was a complete fraud, they said we can do it, but no, we can’t. I’m extremely disappointed at that. Second of all, the curriculum isn’t so focused after all. I don’t understand what they’re getting at - it’s GAC + school curriculum (IGCSE or something) + a little bit of national curriculum.

I really really thought it was going to be just GAC. But no, I was fooled. I talked to my mom about this, and I hope she’ll talk to the headmaster as soon as possible. Besides that, I have to actually be forced to learn music, the one thing I’m very much terrible at. And the teacher doesn’t make learning it easier either. I feel stressed, pressurized and just completely… unfocused.

Gosh. I really have considered to ask if I can move next year. I really want to go to Singapore. My mom just slapped my mouth today because I was backtalking her because she kept denying (the problem was minor actually, it was about sushi and perfectly good veggies thrown into the garbage bin) and yeah, I realized, I must emotionally grow up. But the thing is, I am trying. I really am. But it’s just difficult with my family around because they’re the people who I let loose to. I have to be away from them to develop my emotional maturity. That’s why it’s another good reason to go to Singapore.

I have actually looked up stuff about Singapore education, and I really want to go to Singapore American School. I might’ve mentioned this school before in my previous entries. It’s a really good school (from what I’ve been informed by their site & some people who had applied there but turned down because of the waiting list) but I’m having trouble looking for accommodation. I could just live alone, that’s no problem for me, but the rents are so expensive -.- That’s the most expensive thing with living in Singapore.

If my parents are so opposed by me going to Singapore, I will make the attempts of negotiating with my grandma so she can let me study there. I know for anything academic, she will give. I really want to sum up good arguments so that ONCE AND FOR ALL… I can do something I’ve been looking forward to do.

First step: talking to mom. But wait - I’ve got to gather arguments first. Anyone care to help?

One day, you will see me on the big screen

Hello!! Currently I have flu going on, and I think it’s just so not super because I really hate that feeling of having your nose stuffed… it’s like you can’t breathe and you sound a bit funny when you speak. On the contrary, I’ve been feeling quite well. I’m doing good at school, thank God. Which reminds me, I have a biology test tomorrow on enzymes and I haven’t studied. Then again, I’m sick. It’s not clear whether I’ll be at school tomorrow or not. Oh and I’m sweating like a pig, LOL. I think the weather is getting hotter in this side of the world.

Okay, back to business.
A year ago my aunt — who acted as Senja in a major Indonesian movie called Merah Putih — asked me whether I was serious about doing acting or not, and she offered me acting training. Before you hit the acting scene, she said it was better if I had some coaching first. I thought this was a good idea. The younger we start, the better, right? So now, I’ve asked her if she could coach me, and I’m glad that she said yes. I’m so happy, I really can’t wait to start! I’m quite nervous though, because I don’t really know what the training’s going to be like… especially because the only thing I know about acting is from  my drama lessons that I’ve been doing for the past 2 or 3 years. And they’re just really basic stuff.

Wish me luck! I’m doing this acting training because I really have a passion for acting. I have a passion for writing too, but I can’t keep my head in it. I can only focus in acting. It’s also a quality I share with my aunt. I’m so happy that she’s willling to train me… if there was no person like her, I probably would just chuck those acting dreams away in a garbage bin. But no, she gave me hope. And I’m so glad that God had made me realize the talent I hold in my life… and I am ready to use it to serve Him.

A lot has happened in my life, and I feel lots of blessings coming in. My dad quit his job to do the business that he does now. We have a franchise-restaurant in Bogor and that’s how we’re going to make a living with. My parents also wanted to open a laundry service store and an Alfa Mart (a small mini mart). They’re all franchised-stores. This is something that’s really new, and quite unexpected for me. It’s kind of surreal because eventually if I wanted, the businesses will be handed down to either me or my brother later on. I never saw myself in business. Well I guess I have to now, haha.

Hope all is well with all of you!
Remember, everything comes in two sides, and it all depends on how you look at it! :)

Hello, After SO Long

Hello my Tumblrific readers.

I’m sorry for the super long hiatus, but I’ve been quite distracted with Twitter and spending my holidays (over a month ago). A lot of things has happened in my life. I got in a new school which has the GAC (Global Assessment Certificate) curriculum, which is a curriculum that is basically a college prep. It gets you to university easier, especially because if you do the GAC course, you don’t have to do the foundation course in university anymore. It saves time. The thing that attracted me the most to go there? The fast-track program. If we’re capable of handling the work, we can just study for two years in high school and jetset to university. Appealing. Extremely appealing. I don’t know if they’re running the fast-track program yet, but I’m going to find out in the end of August.

Right, August. It’s the start of school year. I get a ton of work from school now. Not that I’m complaining. I have to admit I study more when I started studying in my new school. I did my homework earlier, completed everything earlier. I love the sense of accomplishment I get after I finish those work faster than others. Oh and guess what? MATH is not my least favorite subject anymore! Everything looks complicated but thanks to the math teacher - who is also the head of school - I can do the math problems easy as 1 2 3 ! What I hate? MUSIC. Urgh I can never get those theories straight if the teacher doesn’t pull himself together. I dislike the guy. I think he should not be a teacher cos he doesn’t have the patience.

I’ve gotten a lot of friends. I’m friends with everybody in the class but I already have some close friends as well, and it is only the first month of school! Incredible. I can’t do that in my previous school. It will take ages to fully blend in with the crowd. I’m not talking months either, YEARS, maybe. The people in my new school were very welcoming & they were very open about everything so I felt more comfortable because they all let me in. I’m so glad for that. I couldn’t ask for something better at school from God.

I think I see a new me in this brand new start.
Let’s pray and hope for the best.

Last...

I decided today would be my last day going to school. Everyone has to admit the induction program was completely meaningless and boring. So I decide I’m going to help out with my mom taking my grandma to the hospital tomorrow. I can’t wait. I hope I’ll score a chance to get Black Eyed Peas’ The E.N.D., haha!

Oh, God. My stomach feels disgusting right now. I have an endless stomachache. For the last 4 days, I’ve been waking up because of a stomachache. It is definitely not food poisoning, cos if it was, I don’t think the symptoms are this. It’s probably because I have stomach problems? I have no idea. I eat regularly. I’m not anorexic. I’m not bulimic. I eat when I want to and need to. But what the heck is wrong with me? Is it stress hormones?

Once I went to the doctor because I had a stomachache and the doctor said, “Are you stressed out? Stress can produce more acid in your stomach.” Well, I guess it’s the stress, but how can stress make ONGOING stomachaches? That’s just really absurd. If you’re a doctor or a health expert and you’re seeing this post, PLEASE tell me what the heck I’m suffering from. Really. It’s driving me crazy. My stomach feels really bad. :(

My stomach feels bloaty. It feels disgusting. I feel fat. No, scratch that. I’m not fat. I HAVE TO BELIEVE I’m not fat, or else I’ll do something stupid, triggered by the fucked stress hormones. Yikes.

OMGYESSSSSS.

It’s been a very long time since I’ve been in Tumblr, most likely because I’m too busy with… Twitter! Duh! ;) Follow me on Twitter!! So.. good news. School is going to be over!!! In like, probably 3 days? I don’t know. Report card day is on Thursday and my brother’s sixth-grade graduation is on Wednesday. I can’t wait to see him in the graduation suit. It makes me remember myself 3 years ago.

Anyway, I still don’t know why school insists us to come and study. For one thing, when I go to school these past few days the teacher keeps giving free time because 1) the grades are already in. So if we do an activity or something that relates to studying, where the heck would those result numbers go to? 2) the tenth-grade-induction thing is completely useless. Well, for me, I guess. I don’t need induction and so do my friends. I’m not going to study in SPH anymore. I don’t need it. My friends don’t need it too because they’re going to tenth grade anyway, and sooner or later, they will adapt by themselves. DUH. Don’t anyone know anything about adaptation??? We don’t need early adaptation cos eventually, we WILL adapt.

Moving away from the super boring school stuff, let’s discuss about this holiday! I heard I’m going to Jogja all the way to Bali with a CAR. A road trip. Gag. Don’t get me wrong, road trips can be pretty fun, but do you have any idea HOW LONG it will take? To Jogja itself it would take a day (possible traffic included). Then we’ll head east. GOSH. IT WILL TAKE A LONG TIME. I hope we’re having the best time. I can’t stand getting car sick and finding out that we’re not staying in a good, comfortable place. That’s just how I am.

Aside the road trip, I’m really looking forward to buying The Sims 3! The best game ever. Seriously, whoever invented it is a total genius. Everyone who worked on it is a total genius. It costs a hell lot, and for once in my life I’d love to get an original game. So when my mom or dad asks, “What do you want for passing the class?” First I was thinking of either a Nokia 6600 Fold (which is really expensive. I doubt they’ll give that to me) or an LG KS360 (cute texting phone, bad specifications), but now that The Sims 3 is HERE, I want it so badly!!! So I’ll sweetly answer, “An original copy of The Sims 3… which is much cheaper than those phones…” costing at Rp. 500 000-ish which is incredibly expensive for a game. BUT HEY, IT’S AN ORIGINAL!!! And just once in my life ;P

The best part? I won’t have to ask for extra money to buy Black Eyed Peas’ new album The E.N.D because the money I saved is very adequate to buy that very much-anticipated record!!

HAVE AN AWESOME SUMMER!!!